Married to the Pastor IV

Last time, I wrote briefly of Deana’s unique ministry journey.  This time, we will discuss an easier subject….me.

“You call yourself a preacher….!”  If I had a dollar for every time someone said that to me.   I find that I don’t act like “preachers”. 

I am a unique minister.  Really, I’m just different;  I believe my journey has made me somewhat different from most of the other pastors I’ve met over the years. 

Growing up in a Pentecostal church gave me a narrow conservative world view.  I learned a lot, and it was a foundation for my belief system today; however, I knew there was something more God wanted to teach me.   By the end of high school, I was certain that I would not be a pastor.  I made it through college and graduated from Oklahoma University with a BBA in finance while I was working for UPS.  My plans were to pursue an upper level management position at UPS when I believe God began to deal with me about starting a church.  Deana and I began to pray about it.  Only one problem:  I didn’t want to pastor a church.  My Grandfather was a pastor, my father was a pastor, and I had seen all the good, bad, and ugly of what goes on in church….from the inside out.  It was not for me. 

Then, Deana and I began to ask each other some  interesting questions:  What if we didn’t take over some other church?  Instead, what if we started a church that we not only enjoyed pastoring, but also enjoyed attending?  What would this type of church look like?  Would anyone attend…especially the unchurched?  These were just a few of the questions we asked ourselves in the beginning, and the answers resulted in launching Faithco church. 

Over time, we have seen just how much God was in us starting Faithco.  God took two very different people, placed them together, and used their uniqueness and passion to reach a community for His cause.  Not only was it okay for Deana to be herself, it was God’s preference.  Not only could I pastor a church, but the way I pastor, and the type of person I am is just what he wanted for this church. 

Remember, we are His workmanship created in Christ.  He made us who we are to be who we are for His Glory.  Let God take your live and use who you are for His cause.  You won’t regret it.

Married to the Pastor III

Although Deana was a believer, she was not raised in church.  I on the ther hand, I came from a Pentecostal background.  When we began to work together in church, there were many things that had to be worked through if we were going to do this together.  We both had much to learn; from God, and from each other.  Here are a few things we have learned from ministering together:

We had to learn to appreciate our differences.  It only takes a few minutes of hanging out with us to figure out that Deana and I are opposites.  In the beginning, I had a preconcieved idea of what I thought a pastor and his wife should be.  I felt we needed to conform to that idea I had.  It was not easy, but that idea had to change. 

Actually, I had to let Deana be Deana and not worry about what others might say or think about her.  Admittitly, she is not the typical pastor’s wife, as she is unique in all that she does.  However, over the years of ministering with her, I have seen many people (especially women) come to know Christ as a result of Deana’s life. 

Deana is a true evangelist at heart, and early on I had to stop trying to change her, and let God use her in her uniquiness. 

As you look at the people around you that are close to you, do you try to change them to be more like you?  Do you let them be who God made them to be.  I have learned that He uses their uniqueness to reach people only they can reach.

Yes, Deana is unique, and I won’t always understand.  However, I have had to remember that her uniqueness is what attracted me to her in the beginning.  

Next time, we will talk about me.

Married to the Pastor II

To understand our ministerial journey together, one would have to go back to the beginning of our ministry together.  I’ll give you the short version.

First of all it is important to note that I didn’t want Deana to be a quiet by-stander in my ministry (not that she ever would be).  I wanted to pastor, lead, serve, etc… with someone who was right there with me.  That is a big deal to me.  I have met pastors whose wives are content to show up and simply support her husband and her church –nothing wrong with that, its just not the way we roll.  Deana is in on almost everything.  She is actually better at most ministerial jobs than I am.  On weekends you may see her greeting, singing on stage, leading the worship experience, preaching, or anything else we do.  And this is just on weekends.  All throughout the week, she is connecting with, praying with, and developing people (especially within he women’s ministry Thirsty Thursday).  She is doing most of the tasks that I am doing in a different way.  We are ministers together.  It is what we value.  We serve God and the people he died to save.

However, our journey together has not been easy (refer to the comment someone left in part 1…it makes sense). 

As you will see in the next blog, allowing God to work changes in us not only made us the ministers we are becoming each day, but it also kept us from driving each other crazy!

Married to the Pastor

I was watching Deana minister this past weekend: ( )

Her message “If Momma Ain’t Happy…” spoke to so many who attended.  At least 9 people made decisions for Christ, and many more responded to her prayer of “the lost coin”.  I have to say, I was really proud of her as she let God work through her to reach people for His purpose.

While working as a pastor has been the most fulfilling work I’ve done, it has also been the most challenging thing I’ve done. I am truely blessed to have such a compatible partner in ministry.  Most people who meet us say that we are perfect for each other and for ministry;  however, ministering together is a unique type of work with a unique dynamic.  What many may not realize is the investment into our relationship and calling that we both continue to make throughout our lives together.  For the next few days, I am going to open up and write about what we have done that makes us a little unique.  I’m also going to talk a little about our jouney together and how we have grown as ministers.